Shitting in the Woods, aka Camping

This past weekend Sam and I went camping in Tate City, Ga, population 32. It was awesome!!! I had had a bad week after receiving some bad news and I was a very stressed out emotional wreck. Being away from everything and everyone was exactly what I needed. Mother Nature has a way of soothing ragged nerves and battered spirits like nothing else, except whiskey. Combine the two and you can take on about any challenge. Sam's hip did absolutely fine which was great because the trails were carved along the mountainside with the trees growing over to form an arching and twisting canopy. Sam found a Gandalf-worthy branch, which he broke in two for us each to have a walking stick. The best part, well actually the funniest part, was that Sam brought his elevated toilet seat from after his surgery, it's basically a walker/toilet-seat chair hybrid that you position over the toilet so you can do your thing from a easier height for post-surgery. Sam dug a 4 foot hole and set the toilet seat over it. Since no one else was around, you could sit on the toilet seat in the middle of the woods, surrounded by its ambiance and do...your...thing, afterwards covering it with a layer of lime and dirt. It was awesome and the best shit ever, sorry for the TMI but it was amazing to say the least and coming home to our un-naturey bathroom was a let-down. I should always be able to listen to birds chirping, river waters rushing, and look at the pretty leaves on the trees while I do my business. It was what God intended, except when it's cold, hot, or raining. Then you thank God for indoor plumbing.

One Year

Sam and I had our one year anniversary this past Sunday. It was a mix of success/disaster. Success: Sam and I cooked dinner together and it was awesome. Disaster: I had a pain pill resistant headache, we both struck out at gift-finding for one another, and I accidentally locked him out of our bedroom and he slept on the couch with the cat. Let me explain. Because Sam works at night 4 out of 7 days of the week, my habit is to lock the bedroom door when I sleep alone. My way of thinking is, if someone breaks into our house and the alarm goes off, I have enough time to wake up, grab a gun, call 911, and get in a ready-to-shoot position before the thin barrier of a locked door gets smashed. I watch way too much crime-themed television and have a overactive imagination... lethal combination. Anyway, Sam and I both fell asleep on the couch and then I moved in to the bedroom and automatically locked the bedroom door behind me. Sam tried to wake me up and asked if I would unlock the door. I don't remember this but I apparently said no and grumbled something unintelligible. I woke up alone and with a kitchen full of dishes.

So that was our one year anniversary in a nutshell. We are so going somewhere else next year.  

Waiting to Expect

I've known always that I want to be a mom, but I wasn't all that focused on it. Then I met Sam and it started to shift up in my priority list. Then I saw him interact with his nephews...and it shot to right under marriage with Sam. Now we are married and everybody is pregnant. Everybody. When Sam and I met, he had 2 nephews and only one of his cousins that were close in age to him had a child. None of our friends had babies. That was 4 years ago. Now, Sam has a total of 3 nephews, 2 nieces, and 1 niece on the way. The cousin that had one child, now is a mother of three. Another cousin had a baby and two others are currently expecting. At our wedding, one of my cousins was pregnant, my wedding photographer was pregnant, and so was my make-up/hair stylist, and my videographer's wife is expecting. Two of my bridesmaids have since then gotten pregnant. Three of my high school friends are/were pregnant and one of Sam's college buddies is pregnant. If you're lost, here's the total:
14 babies born
8 on the way
I think...I got lost trying to calculate...
I want a baby the way an addict wants a fix. But now is so not the time and yes, I know there is no "right" time. But Sam is in school, he is still in recovery, works two jobs, and we still live in Atlanta. I need to be near my mom during my pregnancy and motherhood. I can't imaging doing it 5 hours away from her.

Until Sam is out of school, only has one job, and we are living in the beautiful state of Tennessee, I will continue to impatiently wait to expect.

I'm not sexy

I have recently come to the conclusion that I am not, nor will I ever be, sexy. It has been a hard realization to come to, especially since my husband is the epitome of sexy. He is the classic, tall, dark, handsome type with intense, green eyes and an amazing ass. Really, amazing ass. Anyway, the final conclusion of my non-sexiness occurred this past weekend. I put on one of my short, slinky nightgown, thanks to Victoria's Secret. Sam was laying down on the couch and I sat down at his feet and then started to crawl up between his legs like a sexy kitten. It was working until my knee caught the hem of my gown and caused me to fall flat on his chest, soliciting a loud laugh from him as he told me how cute I am. Sigh. I laid on his chest in the position I fell in, lamenting the fact that I'll always just be cute and clumsy. I'm never going to be sexy. Sam patted my back and told me that he fell in love with cute and clumsy, not sexy. I guess I can be okay with that. So, from now on I'll be the clumsy girl, tripping next to the sexy man with the great butt. Did I mention how awesome his ass is?

Couple Bonding via Shooting Aliens

I had a more activity-packed weekend in mind on Friday, but by Sunday...activity packed morphed into sitting on the couch killing aliens. Now, I never played video games until about a year ago. I always thought they were a silly waste of time. But Sam sweetly asked me to play Halo with him and Sam has this way of making his green eyes sparkle and look puppy dog-pitiful to the point that I'm thinking I'm getting glamored by a vampire. So I started occasionally playing with him here and there. Ever since his hip-replacement surgery last month, he's been playing video games more often.When you are home-bound for more than a month, there are only so many reruns of Swamp People you can watch. I've been playing with him when I've come home from work and now I'm addicted. This weekend, we played the entire Halo 2 game start to finish. It is the best couple-bonding thing ever! We work together, we strategize that Sam will take out the snipers, while I go to the left to take out that big-ass alien. After I get killed, Sam will go after the murdering culprit for revenge. It's awesome! In a month, when Sam is approved for more outdoor activities, like hiking and riding a bike, and the smothering heat gets replaced by autumn, I promise we'll go back to more physical activities. Until then, watch out aliens!

First Inaugral Post

Since I spend at least an hour a day looking at other people's blogs while at work...why not create my own? So I did...here it goes.

I was trying to pinpoint when I knew I loved my husband but I couldn't. There was no way to narrow in on one exact, clear moment. Instead several moments came to mind.

I knew I loved my husband when on our first date, I observed him sincerely asking everyone he encountered how their day was going. And I mean everyone, our waitress, the parking toll booth guy, he gave a friendly nod to people on the sidewalk, and waved at people he passed on the road. He still does that today and you can see the look of surprise on people's faces when he looks them in the eye and asks. You know that probably no one had bothered to ask before. Things like that matter.

I knew I loved my husband when I saw him roughhousing with his nephews on the beach. Later, I got to see him hold his baby nephew and gently kiss him on the head. He loves being an uncle and I know he will love being a father. I feel very fortunate to be the one that will be the mother of his children.

I knew I loved my husband when he helped his disabled brother go to the bathroom and not only cleaned him but became furious when he noticed his brother had not been properly cleaned for a while. This was the sealed deal moment. Sam loves his family so much and will fight for their best interest. I wish more people in his family loved him the way he loved them. 

Everyday, there are moments that refresh my love for Sam. He will walk up behind me and kiss me on the shoulder. He will sing a silly song and have me laughing when I was grumpy just a second before. He will speak softly of our future together and his dreams of raising our children in a house on the hill.

I love him and always will.